Hot,Sexy, & Dead All Over
by Godric sheriff of Area 9
Summary: What if Sookie was the vampire and Eric was the telepathical human with a shit load of problems? Would they still be together? Sookie/Alcide Sookie/Eric Godric/Sookie Alcide/Sookie/Eric
1. Only if For a night

SPOV

Alcide walked in and said, "Mistress a fanger wants your attention." I murmured "Hair color?" He says, "Black" I said "Bring him to me. Alcide you hungry?" Alcide smiles and nods.

The fanger walks in I said "How are you better than any of the others?" He looked up and said "I have sweet blood. I am a Virgin."

I looked at Alcide and nodded. I stood up in my black Christian Louboutin thigh high boots and said "A Virgin?" I walked up to him my red gothic leather corset touching his shoulder.

I rub my Black Caisa leather mini skirt I bit his neck. I moan his blood is so sweet. I said "Alcide drink." Alcide walks over and bites down on his neck he moans. I pulled away I said "Alcide away."

He gave me his your-so-fucking-mine-once-this-fanger-is-gone look. I smile and say "Good bye" Alcide kicks the guy out. He walks up to me and wraps his arms around me.

I say "You feel hard." He chuckles and says "I want you" I jump on the desk table I say, "Later the club needs running and I need to pay bills. Can you bartend for me?" I give him my any-thing-you-want-later-if-you-do-this-for-me look.

He groans and says, "Only you can get me like that." I kiss him and say, "We are so sharing coffins tonight. I looked at the bank account. Hmm $3,000 is missing. I wonder who stole it. My hard earned money however it is they are dead!


	2. Heaven and Hell

EPOV

Some yelled "I want more fries!" I nodded in their direction. Merlotte's Bar and Grill was packed. _'If only I could get in his pants I've been trying' I don't know why he doesn't want me?' _ I looked at Debbie Pelt as she shyly waved at me. I shook my head and groaned.

Only in Bon Temps. Arlene looked at me and said "Look your vampire is here.' I looked over at the vampire. I walked to vampire I said "Can I get you anything." She smiled and said "True Blood please. Pam."

I smiled said "Eric." I walk over to the bar and get her a True Blood. I hand it to her. I stare at her. She looks at me and says, "I know I'm fucking drop dead gorgeous but stop looking at me like a creeper."

I blushed and looked away. Arlene yelled "Eric table six needs a pitcher of beer. And table two, five, and eight want more fries." Sam handed me the pitcher of beer. I sat it a table six. Lafayette said "You look like you just got your first blow job.

I grinned at Lafayette. I said "A hot vampire will do that to you. Six orders of fries." Lafayette said "I am dying back here." I opened the kitchen door. I said "Correction. We're both dying." We started laughing.

Arlene yelled "Two bacon cheeseburgers, three fries, one Caesar salad, and three BLT's." Lafayette said "See Arlene you suck the fun out of everything." I took my fries and set them on their proper tables.

Sam handed me two more pitchers of beer. He said "Tables one, and five. Come back for tables two and four." I walked to table five, Debbie slapped my ass. She said "Firm" Tara walked over to me and slapped Debbie. I winked at Tara. We've been friends since grade school. I set the pitcher down. Tara said "That bitch will not leave you alone. Want to go to a bar?" I said "I'm at one." Tara hit my arm. She said "A vampire bar in Shreveport. Called…Fangasia I think?" I said "Sure" What Could happen?


	3. Locked out of Heaven

SPOV

I sat on my throne and watched the humans. Alcide said "Hungry?" I shook my head. I feel like something is missing. Locked out of heaven started playing_._

_Oh, yeah, yeah,_

_Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,_

_Ooh!_

_Oh, yeah, yeah,_

_Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,_

_Ooh!_

A cute human walked in with another human. Hmm so hot. A blonde. My type. Alcide and "Get him?" I nodded.

_Never had much faith in love or miracles_

_Ooh!_

_Never wanna put my heart on the line_

_Ooh!_

_But swimming in your water* is something spiritual_

I felt odd. In my 1,100+ years I've never felt something so strong. I felt like if anything happened I'd die.

_'Cause your sex takes me to paradise_

_Yeah, your sex takes me to paradise_

_And it shows, yeah, yeah, yeah_

_'Cause you make me feel like I've been locked out of heaven_

_For too long, for too long_

_Yeah, you make me feel like I've been locked out of heaven_

_For too long, for too long_

_Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,_

_Ooh!_

_Oh, yeah, yeah,_

_Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,_

_Ooh!_

Alcide brought the human to me. I said "Your name?" He looked at me with wide eyes.

_'Cause your sex takes me to paradise_

_Yeah, your sex takes me to paradise_

_And it shows, yeah, yeah, yeah_

_'Cause you make me feel like I've been locked out of heaven_

_For too long, for too long_

_Yeah, you make me feel like I've been locked out of heaven_

_For too long, for too long_

_Oh, oh, oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah_

_Can I just stay here?_

_Spend the rest of my days here?_

_Oh, oh, oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah_

_Can't I just stay here?_

_Spend the rest of my days here?_

I said "Your name?" he said "Eric. Eric Stackhouse"

_Yeah, you make me feel like I've been locked out of heaven_

_For too long, for too long_

_Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,_

_Ooh!_

_Oh, yeah, yeah,_

_Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,_

_Ooh!_

I smiled and said "I'm Sookie. Sookie Northman." I stood. Eric's eyes went straight to my outfit. My purple satin corset top and leather pants. My Christian Louboutin thigh high boots making me six inches taller.

I said "Welcome to Fangasia. Your first round is on me." Eric smile and said "Thank you. Ms. Northman." I said "Please call me Sookie. Where are you from?" Eric said "Bon Temps" I said "Small town. Eric this may be blunt but I think you hot and would love to fuck you."

Eric looked at me and said "Whoa that was very blunt." He weakly chuckles. I said "Too blunt?" Alcide chuckles. He whispered "He is too young for you." I laughed and said "1,100 is not old." Alcide said "Too old for him." Eric said "Huh?" I said "I'm thinking about making you mine."

-Sorry next chapter is on Monday!

~Godic


	4. Moonshine

_Previously in Hot, Sexy, & Dead All Over: Sookie said "I'm thinking about making you mine."_

EPOV

I looked at Sookie. I said "I'm flattered. But I don't know you." I looked at her she was …beautiful and gothic. I felt a stirring in my loins I silently sighed. Today would be that day when my cock felt unusually hard. Sookie looked at me. Her blue eyes warm and sad. Sookie said "I have not engaged in a human sex since… well I was one. But I feel like we could make something work."

I looked at her. I said "Sorry but I don't wish to." She and her guard laughed. She said "Well your pants say different. They say '_Take me. Please, take me.'_ Which I don't mind but I would have to fight with Alcide about bloodletting you." I looked at her. What the hell was bloodletting? She said "Bloodletting is when I drink from you. Bloodletting is a more pleasant way of saying that." That Bruno Mars song moonshine came on:

_You know you look even better than the way you did the night before_

_And the moment that you kissed my lips you know I started to feel wonderful_

_It's something incredible, there's sex in your chemicals_

_Ooh, let's go_

_You're the best way I know to escape the extraordinary_

_This world ain't for you, and I know for damn sure this world ain't for me_

_Lift off and say goodbye_

_Just let your fire set me free_

_Oh_

_Moonshine, take us to the stars tonight_

_Take us to that special place_

_That place we went the last time, the last time_

Sookie said "So Eric What do you say?" I looked up I heard someone say '_God if Sookie and Alcide ever found out about me knowing that Longshadow stealing the money. I'd so be dead' _I looked at Sookie I said "Longshadow. Longshadow is stealing money."

_Moonshine, take us to the stars tonight_

_Take us to that special place_

_That place we went the last time, the last time, oh_

_Moonshine, your love it makes me come alive_

_Take us to that special place_

_That place we went the last time, the last time_

_Don't look down, don't you never look back_

_We are not afraid to die young and live fast_

_Give me good times, give me love, give me laughs_

_Let's take a ride to the sky before the night is gone_

_Moonshine, take us to the stars tonight_

_Take us to that special place_

_That place we went the last time, the last time, oh_

_Moonshine, your love it makes me come alive_

_Take us to that special place_

_That place we went the last time, the last time_

Sookie said "Longshadow? Are you sure?" I nodded. I didn't want anyone hurting my Sookie. Great now I'm calling her my Sookie. Jason is so gonna lay into me about this. Sookie said " I contact you tomorrow Eric. Thank you." I smiled Tara grabbed my arm and said "What the Hell were you doing with the Queen of Vikings? She kills anyone who annoys her." I said "Believe it or not, Tara, She wants me. As a Lover." Tara said "Only you would be happy." I said "Would you prefer if I was with Debbie Pelt instead of 'The Queen of Vikings? '" She sighed as we open the doors to her car. I said "Tara, I can be happy. I can't date I know what they think." Tara said "Fine." She drove me home."

When I walked in Gran said "Eric you okay?" I nodded and went to sleep. Then next morning I heard Jason swear so loud the whole town possibly heard. I ran down stairs. Jason said "You must have a very rich girlfriend." I looked at Jason and said " I don't have a girlfriend or partner." Jason said "When did you get enough money to buy a red Audi Spyder Convertible?" I looked in the driveway and there was a red Audi r8 spyder convertible sitting there. I groaned "Sookie." There was a note on the door: _Thanks Eric enjoy the car ~Sookie_


	5. Stay

_The flash back is set in finland in 915AD and Sookie is 18 and Thorir is 25_

* * *

SPOV

"Alcide" I yelled. I needed something sexy to wear. Alcide said "What ever could you need?" I said "I need my short metallic peacock corset tutu dress." Alcide handed me my red dress. I went to my shoes. I murmured "Red or black?" Alcide said "Black." I pulled on my black boots. I remember when I was a human.

"_Mother" I looked down. And saw Asa pulling on my dress. I smiled I picked her up. She was almost six years of age. She said "father said he will home in a tomorrow." I said "yes. your bath is tonight my love." She frowned. I said "my love I know you don't want to take it tomorrow when father is home" she shook her tiny head. I heard Toki cry. I walked into the hut. I heard Toki settle. I smiled I had did want I was told. Marry and bear children. Made Asa dinner and feed Toki. _

_I slept. I was awoken with a kiss from my husband, Thorir. I said "You are home." Thorir said "I missed you. And the children." I smiled Thorir and I married four years past. He said "How is Toki?" I said "Getting better it is me at fault. I should have had him swaddled better." Thorir kissed me and pulled me to the bed. And laid me down. I felt him he wanted me. And only me. He pulled my off and forced into me. I cried out. He was a brute. But I… loved him. After he left the room. Asa cried for me. I ran to her side. She said "Mother I'm scared." _

_I pulled Asa pulled and carried her to my room. I said "sleep, Asa, sleep. Thorir awoke me in the morning. I said "Yes?" He said "I will be back. The men want to hunt." I smiled and said "See you sunset?" He nodded and kissed me and left. Toki started to cry. I went to his cot. I smiled and said "My love why do you cry? Do not cry. My dear" He said "Mother I'm scared." I said "of what? You know your father keeps us safe." He nodded and fell asleep in my lap. _

_At sunset Thorir came home with a buck. I said "Plenty of meat." After we ate we heard screams. And Thorir ran out the hut. I grabbed Tokis' blanket, filled it with food and Asas' things and said "Come, Come children, hurry." I picked up Toki and ran to the edge of the forest. I said "Asa take your brother. I and your father may not make it but you will. I love you. Here are you things"-I handed her the blanket and her things- "Keep him safe. Your father and I love you dearly."_

_I kissed and hugged Asa and Toki. I said "Run and never return. I love you." I ran back to the village. Someone was standing behind me. They said "Welcome to the vampire life and bit me neck_

Alcide yelled "Sookie! I've been calling you. Your human is here. Wipe your face you look like you were crying." I wiped my blood tears away. Eric said "Why did you buy me a car!" I said "It's my way of saying thank you." Eric smiled walked up to me and said "You are very welcome." Eric took a deep breath and kissed me.

* * *

Sorry Haven't posted in a while!

~Godric


	6. Brand New Me

EPOV

Sookie looked at me and said "Well that was shocking." I smiled and said "You want me. I want you. Very simple." She said "You want… me? Of all the girls you could have you want… me?" I said "No one wants to date a telepath. Only resentful girls so they can make there boyfriend envious. I want someone's mind I can't read. Someone who is not trying to use me" Sookie bit her lip. I said "Beautiful dress." She grinned and touched her lips. I groaned and said "Please don't go all teenager on me.

She said. "I have not been kissed like that in over 1100 years when my husband kissed me for the last time before he was killed." Shit she was still in love with her dead husband. She said "You remind me of him but you're kinder." I said "Kinder?" She said "We married I was 10 and he 17. The Viking Invasions of England was the war that he was fighting in in fact I got pregnant before he left. When Thorir came back Asa was born. I never saw him. He was so freaked out about the war.

I tried calming him. He'd rape me he came home but he didn't mean it. It took weeks to get him back to normal but he always went back. I mourned his death for decades." Whoa she was a mom? I said "How many children did you have?" She said "I bore two and was six months pregnant with the third. I lost him." Who would have though Sookie Northman was someone's mother? I said "What happened to them." She said "I took them to the woods when the vampires tore through our village and Gave Asa all the food I could pack and said 'look after Toki. Don't ever come back here. Run.'

I kissed her and my son good-bye and ran back to the village. I don't know I miss them. Asa rubbing her nose when she was sleepy. Toki running around. They were my only children." I took her hand and said "I'm not going anywhere any time soon." I kissed her and carried her to the desk. I was going to have her. She was mine and I was hers. Someone knocked on the door Sookie said "What I'm busy!" Alcide said "Your maker, my grandfather, is here." She groaned and cursed. I kissed her and helped her look presentable. An angelic man walked in the room. She said "Godric. How may I help you?" Godric smiled and me and said "Swanhild Oddrun Olvor Kara Ingigerd Edda introduce me." Sookie said "Godric my name is Sookie for short. Godric this is Eric. Eric this is Godric my savior and maker. He saved me from be blood slave." Godric shook Eric's hand. I said "long name, Sookie." She said "Sookie is just the first letter on my six names." I said "So what happened after you were kidnapped?" She said "I was a blood slave for six months and Godric stumbled upon me in an alley and offered me a new life were I could never be hurt again. I agreed and he turned me.

Why I don't know." Godric said "I thought you would make a good mate for me. And we did fool around but I realized we were just friends. And could only be friends." Sookie said "You wanted me? Why I was battered and a mess." He said "You have beautiful qualities." I said "I see what you see about her. Her smile is incredible. Her compassion is stunning. And she is authentic and trustworthy. She makes you feel to be content when she is nearby. She is raw beauty in its most influential form.

She is amazing. It is difficult not to be in love with her." She looked and me and said "you feel that way?" I said "a little. I just summed up what every human in Fangtasia thinks of you. You really are amazing. It's bizarre how you could have any enemies you have because you're trustworthy, magnificent, gorgeous, and authoritative. You are every guy's dream girl. Anyone who thinks otherwise is crazy, stupid, or both. Sookie grinned and said "That is the most beautiful thing anyone has ever said to me.

Thank you Eric you made my night." Someone knocked on the door. Sookie said "What is it Alcide?" He walked in and I said "We need to leave. Someone called the cops because a vampire was drinking from a human in the bathroom. The cops will be here in twenty minutes. You, Alcide and Godric can stay at my house. The police will be here investigating for a week and a half. Come get what you need." Sookie said "Alcide what?"

He said "A Vampire was feed on a human I didn't know about the police. How did you know about that?" I said "I am a telepath. I know when trouble arrives." Sookie said "Sunlight." I said "My basement. No windows and has AC. Sookie said "Ok. Alcide, Godric you coming?" They nodded. I said "Get your stuff. Hurry we need to be five miles out in three minutes. Go." Sookie and Alcide rushed around the room and pack a suitcase each. I said "Sookie make sure you have those shoes and that dress. I owe you a date." She smirked and said "Trust me I will."

Someone knocked on the door. Sookie said "Enter." A man walked in and said "I'm Sean. I'm looking for my mother." Sookie said "Can't help you, Sean." Sean said "If it helps my real name is Toki." Sookie screamed and lunged herself at him and said "My son. My son you're alive and a Vampire." There was blood running down her face. Godric said "She is crying not hurt." I looked at him. He said "I read minds also." Sookie said "Asa?" He shook his head and said "No. Didn't make it." I said "Sorry to break this up but the cops will in six minutes. Hurry up and get in the car." Sookie pouted but said "Okay. Toki this Eric. My lover." Toki looked at me and hit me. I hit the ground. Before everything went black I heard Sookie scream and say, "Eric!"


	7. Can't Hold Us

SPOV

Alcide and I rushed around the room and pack a suitcase each. Eric said "Sookie make sure you have those shoes and that dress. I owe you a date." I smirked and said "Trust me I will." Eric was so amazing and accepting. I could see me and him together in the long run. I winked at him. Someone knocked on the door. I said "Enter." I was so busy. I had other things to do. A man walked in and said "I'm Sean. I'm looking for my mother." I groaned. I knew I should have never let Alcide do private investigating for vampires.

I said "Can't help you, Sean." Sean said "If it helps my real name is Toki." I looked up and screamed and lunged myself at him and said "My son. My son you're alive and a Vampire." I was so happy to see my son again. It has been over a thousand years since I last saw him. There was blood running down my face. Godric said "She is crying not hurt." Eric looked at Godric. He said "I read minds also." I said "Asa?" He shook his head and said "No. Didn't make it."

I groaned and cried. Asa. My sweet Asa. Eric cleared his throat and said "Sorry to break this up but the cops will in six minutes. Hurry up and get in the car." I pouted I barely talked with my son but said "Okay. Toki this Eric. My lover." Toki looked at Eric and hit him. He hit the ground. I screamed and say, "Eric!" I slapped Toki said "How dare you punch my boyfriend! I swear I will kill you if he dies." Toki said "Mom he is not dad." I said "I'm glad. Your father was a monster!"

I picked up Eric and said "Alcide this is my impertinent child, I birthed, Toki. Toki this is Alcide, my other son. Alcide get the bags please. Godric come on." We ran to the car. I said "Alcide and Toki take my car." I put Eric in the front seat and got in. Godric at in the middle. I sped away. I said "Godric tap his mind I don't know where to go once we get to Bon Temps." Godric said "It does gonna hurt and you know that Swanhild. You love him so I don't want to hurt hi..."

I said "I don't care right now. Tap. His. Mind." Eric let out a pained groan and Godric said "The graveyard. He lives west of the graveyard" I sped up and to Bon Temps. Eric mumbled and began to awaken. Eric sat up and said "Where?" I said "Three mile north of Bon Temps." Eric gave me instructions on how to get to his house. I said "Do you live alone?" He shook his head said "With my grandmother. And my brother Jason." I said "Fun. Make sure they don't kill us."

Eric said "They won't" Eric said "We're here." Godric jumped out the car. Eric kissed me and said "I will not let anything happen to you. I promise." Eric opened my door. I Smiled. Eric said "Come in please." I walked through the threshold. Eric yelled "Gran. We have guests." A little old lady walked out and said "Eric who is our guests?" Eric blushed and said "My girlfriend, Sookie, her maker, Godric, Her prodigy, Alcide, and her son, Toki."I grinned. His grandmother said "I'm Adele. Eric you never told me you had a girlfriend!" Adele Shook my hand a said "You are dazzling. Your make-up is spectacular and dramatic. So do you want a Tru Blood?" Eric said "You accept her?" Adele laughed and said "Your fond of her. What is not to like?" Eric kissed Adeles' cheek. Adele said "Jason will be in shortly." Eric showed us to the basement. I said "Eric, I talked with Toki. he won't hit you again." Eric smiled and said "He might if he finds out what my plans are with you tonight." I said "And what might that be?" Eric said "You, Sookie are not leaving my room til dawn. I have a killer headache, and I think sex and blood will happen. My blood and you are the only who can stop my headache." I teased "Why did you have a headache?" He said "Because all I keep thinking about having sex with you"


End file.
